The First Cut

When a child is in foster care one of the rules we have to follow is that foster parents are not allowed to cut the foster child's hair unless given permission of the birth parent or it is court ordered... yes it sounds ridiculous, but it's true.

At 15 months Nick desperately needed a hair cut as his blonde wispy hair was in his eyes and covering his neck. I asked the case worker to talk to the birth mother about getting it cut. She agreed, but wanted to be present for the event since, after all, it was the first hair cut. So, I found a local salon and the case worker, the birth mother and her mother met up with Nick and I for the hair cut.

Most people ask what it's like to have contact with the birth mother. In short, it's awkward and anxiety producing. She makes very little eye contact with me and basically just ignores my presence. She's extremely insecure and comes across as quite angry about the fact that her son is in foster care... seemingly to forget the fact that it was her choices in life that placed him there. Meeting her mother at the same time was enlightening... she made rude and inappropriate comments to me. The apple does not fall far from the tree in this case.

I didn't have a say in how the hair was cut, but rather got to stand on the side lines and watch the mullet take it's shape. Yes, it's true... Nick now has a mullet. With the way that his hair curls, sometimes he looks like a little Amish boy. I keep telling myself it will grow. :)

And this was just another day in our lives. Maybe someday we'll get to do things the normal way.